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*ROME—The Eternal City’s taxi drivers have expressed widespread indignation following a controversial comparison made by Mercedes Formula 1 chief Toto Wolff, suggesting that Roman cabbies drive with the same frenetic energy as Formula 1’s Max Verstappen. The statement, uttered in the aftermath of the Spanish Grand Prix, has sparked a vehicular revolt on the cobblestone…
*MOSCOW—In a shocking announcement that has left the nation reeling, the Kremlin officially categorized the recent National Hide-and-Seek Championship winners as a dire threat to national security. This unprecedented move, as outlined in a statement from the Ministry of Silly Affairs, has raised serious questions about the nature of competitive games in the context of…
*PARIS—In a groundbreaking move that is set to redefine the landscape of combat sports, the World Boxing Federation (WBF) announced on Monday a series of mandatory genetic tests designed to verify whether athletes genuinely possess the “boxing gene” prior to competing at any sanctioned event. This radical initiative, dubbed “Born to Box,” aims to not…
